personal

Ubah

by FeR on May 5, 2013 in personal

Malaysia’s 13th General Election today. GE13 or PRU13 (Pilihan Raya Umum).

As much as I did not want to believe (giving them the benefit of the doubt) that they would use such a dirty tactic, I have seen posts on Facebook about these “ghost voters” that were brought into Malaysia in droves.

[I am indignant and I am upset because despite not being in Malaysia at this very moment, I am very much Malaysian and I do love the country I was brought up in. So bear that in mind before reading this next part]

At the same time, when I look at the photos posted up of these “ghost voters”, I feel pity for them. Their faces so kesian when they got singled out/caught. I hope that people back home will keep their cool and report them to the right authorities than to be taken in by the moment of anger (of such hanky panky!) and lash out at these people who don’t know better. I believe we all want a better future for our tanah air and will do the right thing when confronted with these “ghost voters” but one is just a little concerned as some are quite passionate about the issue. These “ghost voters” were probably given money that was desperately need (for themselves or for their families) to do a seemingly simple task (to them) and they really wouldn’t know better. Nor would they know what Malaysians are striving for – a clean and fair election – because they are NOT Malaysians. They will not hold on to any principles or integrity of keeping the election clean because they don’t know what it is, they are just carrying out a paid task. The real offenders are the people who brought them in, gave them ICs and told them who to vote.

I’m sorry I didn’t play my part for GE13 – I can only offer my prayers that God will deliver the righteous. I will be tuning in to ubah.tv for updates at 1230am (NZ time) in anticipation of the results. I will (in the mean time) keep praying for peace and a clean election process while waiting to hear back. I pray my friends will be able to fly back home from where they are, that the “inordinate” delay will be lifted!

It’s time for a change.

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Slight comfort

by FeR on March 26, 2013 in personal

At the risk of sounding desperate when I type this, I urge you to be completely honest with your feelings. I am just being honest with myself. I don’t usually put this out in public (as in, internet-searchable public) but I would be lying if I said I do not think of, “When will I find that person to share my life with?”

I was watching HIMYM and got really confused with the whole episode, so I searched for some sort of explanation online. I felt a little depressed when I read about what some other people thought of the episode (which didn’t even cross my mind until I read their comments!) but I was pleasantly surprised to see comments from single guys (if you can trust the authenticity of the contents) who mentioned that the episode “killed them” or “hit home”.
I’m not a sadist. I’m surprised because in the current “relationship economy”, men always seem to have the upper hand and plentiful choice when it comes to settling down, while the women struggle to find half decent blokes. Maybe the men do not share it as often as women…or maybe the comments weren’t 100% true.

I’d like to think that it is reflective of their true feelings and intentions. Men in their 30s who wants to settle down but have not met the woman they want to be the mother of their child(ren) yet. I’d like to think that there are some “Teds” out there who is ready to commit and are sincerely looking for life partners.

Now, please point me to the direction of those men! :P

—
Edited

I receive a phone call from cynical me right after I hit “Publish”. I hope those commenters weren’t trying to pull off some weird, sick scam to con vulnerable ladies. :pfft:

Cynical me also reminded that I have met someone like that – who tells you all the things that you thought of/want and made you feel so lucky to have found someone of the same wavelength. Manipulative lowlife.

Hmmm…thanks, cynical me. I will just die alone.

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CNY-themed dream

by FeR on February 3, 2013 in personal

I dreamt I was in an east Asian country – Hong Kong? I remember thinking in the dream we could take the bus or train back but we could also walk back.

In the dream, I was walking alone browsing for 臘腸 (lap cheong) and 肉乾 (bak kwa) – was so happy to have found a shop selling 燒味 (siew mei). I thought to myself, “I can 打包 for the rest of them back at the hotel.” I turned around and there was another shop selling similar things. You have no idea how excited I got (it must be because in my conscious mind, I know I can’t find it where I am now – Hastings) and I wanted to check and compared both shops!

When I was about to step into one of the shops, I bumped into my parents. They were also shopping around the area (I remember telling them I have walked and walked, not realising I’m so far away from where we started. I may take the bus/train back) and accompanied me when I was checking the prices out. In my dream, my dad said the meat didn’t look good and it’s so expensive. My mom stayed with me to sample the round 肉乾 – ones they have in Malaysia but are more expensive than regular ones (they call it the “gold coins/medallions” in Malaysia). I told my mom that I thought the meat was not as “juicy” as what we usually get in Malaysia but it was better than nothing.

I looked at the bottom row of the meat cabinet and saw that they sold 臘腸 that is like the ones we get back home, too! Yay!

Then a voice from somewhere in my head (this is still in my dream) said, “But those are all unhealthy and doesn’t fit in with your diet now.”

I don’t know if I stopped dreaming at that point or just didn’t remember the details after that.
Weird, huh?

—

CNY is definitely around the corner but the thought of all the food I miss is pushed away by my current self of wanting to maintain a healthy diet to lose weight.
:P

I miss being a kid, when things were as complicated as “will my parents buy me that new dress or new pair of shoes” or “how much 紅包 (ang pow) will I get?” Most importantly, I miss being around my family. What is with age and jiwang-ness during festive times???

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Where did January go?

by FeR on February 1, 2013 in monologue,personal

The title speaks for itself.

When I was at work and writing up CD dispensing in the book, can’t believe it’s February! I guess the move sort of threw my sense of time and days out for a bit and then when I started work again, it’s time for end of the month processes again. I’m sure I just went away for NewYear’s only two weeks ago.
:P

New place is nice and warm. Yes, it’s no longer too dark to sleep. I do need to find out what’s the best way to walk/bike to work, though. Find out street names around us.
The only downside is the close proximity to our neighbours. The one behind us drinks every night (we’ve been here since Tuesday and yup, every night) – even though they stop at 8pm (930pm tonight, maybe because it’s Friday). They get really loud drinking on their deck. Tuesday is our rubbish/recycling day here…and I saw two carton boxes of empty beer bottles. I suppose it’s not that much to them.
The one beside us (by the bedrooms’ side) has at least two dogs. I have not seen them yet but I’m pretty sure one is a big dog and one is a small dog – you can tell by their barks.
:P

I don’t mind dogs but I do mind their barking when it sounds like they are just under my window (yea, it’s REALLY close to the neighbour) at 630am.
:pfft:

Don’t know if I want to get too settled in here. It’s a nice little place and I’m starting to really like the space I’ve created in my room. Uh oh. Better not be too good at making a cosy room for myself, else it’d be hard if something changes later in the year.

—

I dreamt about a red popcorn machine this week. It had a clear, see-through dome as a cover, too. I dreamt that some teenagers were taking it away from my house (ie stealing it right under my nose!). Weird. And I had a mother-in-law but in the dream, I do not recall being married. When I tried to go and see her (because the teens said my mother-in-law said they could take it, and yelling, “BUT SHE GAVE THAT TO ME! IT’S MINE!” did not stop them taking it back to her place), her place was an old, wooden building. High ceiling, dark, light shining through only one small spot. There were two people (forgot it they were men or women) sitting on the left side playing cards. When I asked where is my mother-in-law, the one who was facing my direction said, “She’s on the phone.” Made me wonder if I should walk in, or wait at the door (but I didn’t move while thinking it in my dream), or why didn’t they pass the message one, or why was she ignoring me. Flash to the next scene, I was at some kind of rooftop where I found a big plastic bag full of stuff – some were mine (apart from the popcorn machine) and I thought, “HEY! THEY STOLE MORE OF MY STUFF!” There was a little red notebook (like the ones we use at work for back-up log/special orders/expiring stock) in the plastic bag as well with names of people and items they were after. They were stealing stuff to sell to these people who wanted those items!

…then I woke up.

—

Anyway, so, where did January go?

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Hello 2013

by FeR on January 14, 2013 in personal

It’s been a while and I wonder if any still checks in here.
:P

I did not make any new year’s resolution in 2012, I don’t think I achieved any of the things I listed down in 2011 although I suppose, it’s still relevant for this year.

Right now, I’m actually in the midst of preparing dinner. Chicken drumsticks with salad.
SALAD!
FeR and SALAD?!!?
You may wonder if you have fallen into a rabbit hole or accidentally walked through a portal to another dimension…but no. It’s true. I’m trying to eat healthy, BE healthy.

Actually, that’s not the main reason. I’m doing this because:
1. I’m vain. I want to be thinner to look better.
2. It’s not economical to buy new clothes to fit me.
3. Age is catching up and I really need to be more serious about my health.

So being healthy ranks third in my motivation to “eat healthy”
:hee:

I know I’m not fat but I am definitely fat-ter.
JoFo just made me realise that perhaps it is the pill that’s causing my weight gain – I have never given this a thought because I get feedback re:weight from people on the pill within a month or 3 months if it affects them. JoFo also made me realise maybe my “side effect” was a gradual increase in weight instead of an instant effect, but I have so many other factors running through my head. For example, the “eating like crazy” when I am on a holiday, especially a trip back to Malaysia. 5 meals a day is not healthy, is it?
Another factor may be age. Like what Kath said, welcome to the 30s. No longer can I “skip a meal and lose 3kg” (I’m quoting Kath, it’s an exaggeration but I get her point) and even if you go to the gym 5 times a week, you’re just maintaining your weight and not losing it.
:pfft:
Age together with my lazy days off: recipe for disaster.

Believe me it’s a struggle. I’ve never been an active person (apart from the last 2 years in secondary school) but my early 20s’ body has been very kind to me. It reminds me of my skin – never had any problems in my teenage years but BOOM! Payback in my 20s. It’s my body’s “payback time”.

The season has come to be more conscious about what I put in, what I do, what I don’t.
I know there are other pressing things going around in the world but this is just a personal resolution, don’t judge me if I do not include “world peace” in my resolution (world news on telly everyday is another story; scary and sad).

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